That's The Way Love Goes.

I think I was in 6th grade when this song/video came out:

I was pretty much obsessed with it. "Like a moth to the flame/burned by the fire." Is it ironic that in my "love life" that's not the way love goes... but in derby, it's always been the way love goes?

I'm not gonna share too much about my love life here, but I will say that it's been a source of good, and very consistent good, in my life.

And roller derby's been more like a bonfire. 

Often a rush of excitement, sometimes dies down in the night when people are too busy F'ing around to pay attention... and then once in a while some jackass throws an old tire in and fucks up the whole smell/mood of the place.

Don't worry, I'll get to the tire tossers later...

My point is this: I'm passionate and inspired by roller derby: but that doesn't mean it hasn't broken my heart a hundred thousand times.

I guess the difference between me and a lot of other skaters who started when I did is a kind of derby co-dependence. I can change derby! Derby really loves me, deep down. I stay for the good times.

It's funny, but it's true! And this dynamic really started from my very first practice... Which I'll tell you all about next time!

In the mean time, though, I wanna drop some serious wisdom, are you ready for it?

This picture is in no way related to anything, I just thought it was funny.

Ok, here it is: Love derby on your own terms, leave derby on your own terms.

If you think roller derby is only going to make you happy, think again. The social interactions you have with 80 alpha women will challenge you, break your heart, and make you cry.

You came to roller derby a rough gem.

And the social interactions you have, if you can learn from them, will grind you into a shiny diamond.

I would say the majority of people who leave derby blame it on whatever they wanna blame it on, but it's usually *really* because of a social situation gone bad. Which no one wants to admit, but it's almost always true.

I will talk more about this subject later, but for now I just wanna say: decide what you wanna get out of derby, and how far you wanna go with it. And then, no matter who says what to you, KEEP GOING until you get there.

I didn't last 7 years because everybody loves me.

I have people in my own league who can't stand me! But I decided I would only leave when it was according to my plan, on  my terms and I'm so grateful that I did.

If I had left the first time someone was a bitch to me, I might not have ever made it past my first practice!
: ) Let alone gathered all the excellent memories I'll carry with me for the rest of my life.


Have a rad day today! Here's a little sumthin sumthin for ya:


Ninja For Hire

 And don't forget this little guy(s)!