Roller Derby Coach Coaching: FINAL PART 4

After this one, I'm going back to my regularly scheduled blogging.

This is a lesson I re-learned recently... and that is:

You can't please everyone all the time.

But, at the same time:

I really check to see if can take the negative feedback that I'll sometimes get and really weigh it out before I decide it's not valid.

Sometimes people are just crabby, or bitchy, or whatever....

And sometimes there's a reason for it.

When we were kids, my brother and I both wanted to be stand-up comics.

maybe we both still kinda do...

So I have this tendency to over-exaggerate and over emphasize my points sometimes, for comedic effect.

Bill Hicks: a man ahead of his time.

Recently, while coaching;

I joked that the potential for the team was amazing, considering there wasn't "shit to do around here 9 months out of the year" but to focus on roller derby.

This was found to be super offensive to some. Funny fail, I guess.

I'm all about self reflection. But sometimes people expect a little too much out of their coaches.

Like... I don't know... perfection?

even this snow leopard thinks that's unreasonable.

When you're coaching: do your best.

Take in feedback, weigh it against your own ideas. Be open to new ideas. Be willing to find a gift for yourself at the end of every criticism.

 

Even if the gift is just the patience to deal with critics, and keep shining on.

One of my favorite responses to new ideas and conflict alike is :

I don't know how I feel about that. I'm gonna think about it and get back to you.

Because, often, I don't. And reflection takes time.

I'm human just like everybody else. My first reaction to any kind of criticism is to be hurt.

Then, once that's out of the way, I can get to work on the gift finding.
Is there some way I can improve my coaching, based on this feedback? 

Most of the time, I can.

But sometimes, there's just nothing there to work with but somebody having a bad day and taking it out on you.

One example of a "yes" decision:

Yes, I can definitely see how the word "retarded" can be offensive to large groups, I'll nix that word and just over-use "ridiculous."

One example of a "no" decision:

Sorry, I'm not gonna limit my swearing. Those are some of my favorite descriptive words!

You get the idea.

Any time you put yourself out there in a teaching role, there's going to be people who want to shoot you down.

Especially Alpha Women.

Which may make one wonder why I'm so into coaching, being someone who gets to experience this in a new town every week!

 

There's no simple answer to this. It's kind of what I spend my whole blog explaining, in a way.

But, I will say this: it's similar to the relationship I have with my crabby cat, Kitten.

She makes me crazy sometimes. (most of the time)

But when she's loving, you feel like a million bucks.

Have a megasuperfuckingamazinggoddamrediculousycrazygoodsonofbitching rad day today!

Here's my parting gifts!